He told me he loved the children.
But he also told me how unhappy he had become.
He described arguments, emotional pressure and physical confrontations.
Then he said something I will never forget.
He told me there had been moments when he felt so hopeless that he wanted to die.
I looked at him and told him the only thing I knew to say.
“You have to get out.”
I told him that love wasn’t supposed to make somebody want to disappear.
I told him he needed to get healthy.
I told him his children needed him.
Most importantly, I told him that whatever happened next, he had to choose life.
He listened to me.
But he didn’t stay away.
That was one of the hardest things for me to understand.
Because I had lived through an unhealthy relationship myself.
I knew what it was like to stay when you knew you should leave.
I knew what it was like to believe that tomorrow might be different.
I knew what it was like to love someone and still know that being with them was destroying you.
Years earlier, I had reached my own breaking point.
I packed what I could.
