She explained that we could not even discuss fertility treatment until your condition had been properly investigated. She also told me that the follow-up appointment was important.
I was frightened. I imagined losing you to an illness I did not understand, and I was ashamed that I had spent so much time asking you for another child when you were already worried about your health.
On the way home, you asked whether we needed to return. I told you we would. But I did not tell you how worried I had become.
I wanted to make an appointment. Then I wanted to wait until you were less frightened. Then I told myself I would explain everything after the weekend.
I kept delaying it.
I have no excuse for that.
I also need to tell you that the clinic sent a reminder today. I have kept it because I do not know how to explain why I have allowed this to become another secret between us.
